John Duttine stars as David Powlett-Jones who has been invalided out of the army during the First World War and is sent to work in a large public school in Devon....
Shot in the bright postal colours of a seaside postcard, Carry on Henry applies the usual Carry On sniggering to the married life of Henry VIII. Talbot Rothwell's script is standard bedroom farce and full of jokes about choppers, while the threat of beheading and the actuality of torture are constantly present but only as the terrible things that happen to cartoon characters who will be back next time. Sid James turns in one of his better performances as the endlessly lecherous and fickle Henry, married to Joan Sims and lusting after Barbara Windsor. There is a genuine sexual chemistry between James and Windsor which at times almost breaks open the farce formula. The usual regulars--Kenneth Williams as Thomas Cromwell, Terry Scott as Cardinal Wolsey, Charles Hawtrey as Sir Roger--do their usual turns; Williams is more subdued than usual, while Hawtrey hugely enjoys playing the Queen's secret lover. This was not one of the high points of the series, but it has its own curious charm. On the DVD: The DVD has no extras whatever, but is a good clean print in 1.77:1 ratio with crisp mono sound. --Roz Kaveney
Ripping Yarns: six episodes of Michael Palin's remarkable comedy showcase in one box set. The Testing of Eric Olthwaite: Set in the days of dark depression before Last of the Summer Wine started bringing jobs to the area. Eric's tough mining parents find their son so boring that they run away from home. Eric torn between love for his parents and lack of brain cells becomes involved with a hardened criminal. The rest is history. Tompkinson's Schooldays: Set in the Edwardian era the heyday of school stories it has all the authentic ingredients for absolutely topping schoolboy fun - excitement adventure heroes and bullies. Escape from Stalag Luft 112B: A tale of courage and valour from behind the lines in the Kaiser's Germany. An inspiring story of camp life and British officer who won't lie down! Whinfrey's Last Case: Dashing debonair Gerald Whinfrey saves his country twice a week but in 1913 a German plot to start the First World War without telling anybody coincides with his holiday. Where do Whinfrey's priorities lie? Has he got any? The Curse of the Claw: Gothic horror comes to Maidenhead. A timely reminder of what happens when men dabble in the dark world of oriental superstition. Michael Palin aided by plastic surgery plays old and young Kevin as well as Kevin's childhood hero Uncle Jack - an enormously cheerful physical disaster area who has had every disease known to man usually at the same time. Golden Gordon: Superfan Gordon Ottershaw supports a team which hasn't won a match for six years. But worse is yet to come when Gordon and his bicycle clips are re-united in a last desperate bid for glory.
Carry On Don't Lose Your Head parodies the adventures of the Scarlet Pimpernel, with crinkly, cackling Sid James as master of disguise the Black Fingernail and Jim Dale as his assistant Lord Darcy. He must rescue preposterously effete aristo Charles Hawtrey from the clutches of Kenneth Williams' fiendish Citizen Camembert and his sidekick Citizen Bidet (Peter Butterworth). The Black Fingernail is assisted in his efforts to thwart the birth of the burgeoning republic by the almost supernatural stupidity of his opponents, who fail to recognise the frankly undisguisable Sid James even when dressed as a flirty young woman. What with an executioner who is tricked into beheading himself in order to prove the efficacy of his own guillotine, it's all a little too easy. As usual, no groan-worthy pun is left unturned, nor unheralded by the soundtrack strains of a long whistle or wah-wah trumpet. This is pretty silly stuff even by Carry On standards, with most of the cast barely required to come out of first gear and an overlong climactic swordfight sequence hardly raising the dramatic stakes. Most of the humour here resides neither in the script nor the characterisation but in the endlessly watchable Williams' whooping, nasal delivery (occasionally lapsing into broad Cockney) and the jowl movements of the always-underrated Butterworth. On the DVD: There are no extra features except scene selection. The picture is 4:3 full screen ratio.--David Stubbs
Many years have passed since baby William was snatched from Satan's grasp. Protected from his sordid past by his adopted parents, William has grown into manhood unaware that he is the son of Satan.
Now Satan has sent the sultry Witch Delores to find his kidnapped heir and return him to his side, in the depths of hell. To fulfill Satan's devious plan, Delores must first seduce William...and whoever gets in her way will die!
Narrated by Charles Gray (Diamonds Are Forever) On the Game is a riotous look at the history of the oldest profession from the ancient Hebrews who decreed all women must prostitute themselves once to the Roman Emperor Claudius' wife who was the most famous part time hooker to the Victorians who were austere on the surface but not when their clothes were off! Starring some beautiful girls with lashings of nudity and some true British greats such as Carmen Silvera (Allo Allo) and David Brierley (Voice of K9 in Doctor Who) On the Game is a vintage slice of Slap & Tickle.
Episodes 12 - 16
A busy bank holiday.... A ham fisted assistant.... Increasing paranoia.... All in a days work... Award winning playwrite Tim Firth (writer of Calendar Girls) creates a new comedy drama set in an electrical superstore. Alan assistant manager at 'Rocket' gets a chance to be the store manager on a busy bank holiday whilst his boss is away. However it seems his boss has laid a trap for Alan in the shape of Frank a mid-60's guy on a trainee scheme. Alan is forced to oversee a man who kn
Papillon (Dir. Franklin J. Schaffner 1973): They called him Papillon meaning butterfly. If only he had wings to go with the name. Unable to fly Henri Charriere virtually willed himself free. He persisted until he did the impossible: escape Devil's Island. Based on Charriere's bestseller and shot in Spain and Jamaica Franklin J. Schaffner's film of Papillon united two stars at key career junctions. After a decade of fine work in The Great Escape The Sand Pebbles and Bullitt Steve McQueen found in Charriere another ideal tough-guy role. Coming off The Graduate Midnight Cowboy and Little Big Man Dustin Hoffman again distinguished himself as Dega Charriere's scruffy friend. Midnight Express (Dir. Alan Parker 1973): Brad Davis and John Hurt star in this riveting true story of a young American's nightmarish experiences in a Turkish prison and his unforgettable journey to freedom. Busted for attempting to smuggle hashish out of Istanbul American College student Billy Hayes (Davis) is thrown into the city's most brutal jail. After suffering through four years of sadistic torture and inhuman conditions Billy is about to be released when his parole is denied. Only his inner courage and the support of a fellow inmate (Hurt) give him the strength to catch the Midnight Express (prison code for escape). Missing (Dir. Costa Gavras 1982): Director Constantin Costa-Gavras made his English-language film debut with this political thriller based on a true story. Although the nation depicted is never named directly the action clearly takes place in Chile after the military coup. Missing centers around the disappearance of Charles Horman (John Shea) an American expatriate who lives with his wife Beth (Sissy Spacek) in South America. One night armed soldiers enter their home and drag him away. In desperation Beth decides to contact Charles's father Ed (Jack Lemon) and ask for help. In contrast to his left-wing daughter-in-law Ed is staunchly patriotic. But as he gets the runaround from both American and Chilean officials Ed receives a cold hard lesson in political reality... and learns some ugly truths about US involvement in Latin America.
Joan Collins and David Hasselhoff star in this made-for-TV comedy caper, in which a con artist who has just gotten out of jail. Curt Taylor (Hasselhoff) finds himself back in business when he becomes an assistant to glamorous film star Cartier Rand (Collins). Curt's primary interest in working with Cartier is the opportunity to get his hands on her world famous and highly-valuable collection of jewelry. In time, however, Curt finds himself attracted to Cartier, which will take a bit of explaining, since he informed Cartier's jealous fiance that he was gay in order to win the job. The Cartier Affair also stars Telly Savalas, Charlies Napier, and Ed Lauter.
The Lost World is in danger of extinction. Through bribes and brute force a greedy industrialist in search of oil is raping the land and slaughtering its wondrous dinosaurs. The Lost World natives urgently summon their friends and the old explorers reconvene in an effort to save the land they had once promised to protect. Upon their return the rescuers discover that man's greed has brought in this enchanted land to the brink of apocalyptic destruction. Bountiful trees are levelled the land is ravaged and the natives are being enslaved. The relentless hammering of oil drills has thrown this fragile ecosystem out of balance and a dormant volcano awakens in anger. The group must outwit man and nature in a desperate attempt to save themselves the land and the vulnerable inhabitants of The Lost World.
Three episodes of animated adventures with J and K as they attempt to clean up the Earth from the slime of the universe! Along with their colleagues Zed and Elle they provide intergalactic top-secret security services to guard the earth from extraterrestrial evil-doers. With firepower and attitude to burn agents Jay and Kay pursue their mission to protect the earth from the scum of the universe. Episode titles: The Goodbye Syndrome The Buzzard Syndrome The Irritable Bow-Wow Synd
A disturbing true story set in Texas 1984. A large corporation producing toxic substances that might cause defects in an unborn child orders the female workforce to have compulsory sterilisation or be sacked. One poverty-stricken woman fights back...
T3 - Rise Of The Machines (Dir. Jonathan Mostow 2003): A decade has passed since John Connor (Nick Stahl) helped prevent Judgment Day and save mankind from mass destruction. Now 22 Connor lives off the grid - no home no credit cards no cell phone and no job. No record of his existence. No way he can be traced by Skynet - the highly developed network of machines that once tried to kill him and wage war on humanity. Until... ...out of the shadows of the future steps the T-X (Kristanna loken) Skynet's most sophisticated cyborg killing machine yet. Sent back through time to complete the job left unfinished by her predecessor the T-1000 this machine is as relentless as her human guise is beautiful. Now Connor's only hope for survival is the Terminator (Arnold Schwarzenegger) his mysterious former assassin. Together they must triumph over the technologically superior T-X and forestall the looming threat of Judgment Day...or face the apocalypse and the fall of civilization as we know it. The 6th Day (Dir. Roger Spottiswoode 2000): Superstar Arnold Schwarzenegger is Adam an ace pilot in the very near future who is having a serious identity crisis. An illegal corporation illegally cloned him and now they're trying to kill him to hide the evidence. Torn from his beloved family and faced with a shocking exact duplicate of himself Adam races against time to reclaim his life and save the world from the underground cloning movement. From the director of Tomorrow Never Dies The 6th Day also stars powerhouse actors Robert Duvall and Michael Rapaport. Prepare for a high-tech sci-fi blast with twice the Arnold and twice the action! Last Action Hero (Dir. John McTiernan 1993): Danny Madigan (Austin O'Brien) a young cinema fan is crazy about his all-time great movie hero L.A. cop Jack Slater (Arnold Schwarzenneger). Having received a magic golden cinema ticket Danny is blasted through the big screen and into the action alongside his celluloid hero who is more than a little puzzled by his presence. Fasten your seatbelt as the dare-devil duo dodge bullets bombs and bad guys in a whirlwind world where anything is possible! But. ..disaster strikes when the baddies grab half the magic ticket and make their escape into the real world where they find life a doddle for two rogues intent on madness and mayhem.With Jack and Danny in hot pursuit hold your breath as the action addicts discover that real life can be even more exciting than the movies.
Australia 1958. A nine year old white girl is found murdered in a remote cave and the local police are quick to arrest an illegitimate Aborigine by the name of Max Stuart. Under interrogation Max admits to the the killing and signs the statement that will send him to the gallows. With no Court of Appeal established in the country and a legal system compromised by intimidation tactics from institutional racism gifted but naive lawyers David O'Sullivan (Carlyle) and Helen Devaney (
Put Charles Grodin together with a 200-pound Saint Bernard and you're likely to come up with some good laughs. In this popular family comedy from 1992 Grodin plays a beleaguered dad who reluctantly lets his kids keep the lost puppy they've adopted. The dog quickly grows into the huge and clever hound named Beethoven. In a marked departure from his nice-guy roles in several Disney comedies from the 1960s and 70s, Dean Jones plays the villainous veterinarian who abducts Beethoven to be a subject in his sadistic animal experiments. The kidnapping sets the stage for a raucous rescue and, of course, an inevitable sequel. Innocuous but harmlessly entertaining, Beethoven is one of those movies that some kids can't get enough of. --Jeff Shannon
In this adaptation of Conan Doyle's 'The Lost World' Professor Challenger (John Rhys-Davies) endeavours to prove the existence of an ancient prehistoric world hidden away in the unexplored jungles of Africa - a place where dinosaurs still roam. Undaunted by the ridicule of the British scientific community Challenger sets off on a perilous expedition to find the mythical Lost World. Accompanying him is arch rival Professor Summerlee (David Warner) rich and beautiful photographer
Return To the Lost World' the sequel to 'The Lost World' picks up where the first film left off. The idyllic beauty of the Lost World its people and the wondrous dinosaurs inhabiting it are in danger of extinction due to the actions of Dr. Haymans an immoral and greedy industrialist in search of oil. In an effort to save the land the native tribes summon the help of their explorer friends Professors Challenger (John Rhys-Davies) and Summerlee (David Warner) Ed Malone Jenny Nielson Malu and Jim all of whom had vowed to return to the Lost World should they ever be needed. On arrival they learn the relentless ravaging of the land has thrown the fragile ecosystem out of balance and awakened a dormant volcano. Again the intrepid team of explorers is hindered in its attempts to save the Lost World this time by a variety of perils including a school of prehistoric piranhas a river of molten lava Haymans' ruthless thugs and a very hungry T-Rex!
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